MoldHawk Revield

Good day, ok this is starting to get creepy, first I thought it was just me, but aparently this is an international phenomonum! all around the world people trust thier couches, and are unsuspectingly robbed of precious time!(and or chips.) Went online and within a minute found a story about a couple in England, who believe aliens inhabit thier couch, the husband refuses to sit on it untill it's been "cleansed". So thats easy to dismiss, but what about Sam losing six hours, and all her chips,(Carlin, I'm not sure if your losing a day on your computer chair counts or not, is your coffee missing or just cold?) so what I think maybe happening is some sort of interplanetary moocher's party, where the alien guests slip in and steal our beer/snacks(maybe coffee, but that must be the moocher morning after trick,)then leave us with the bleary eyed mess. I have had a week of o.t. hell,(wheres the recession when I need it?)so have had little time to follow up on my research promise, but tried to contact Barry from the Furniture/Time Travel Insitute of Technoligy, Canadian Branch, earlier today, and his mom said she has never heard of him, me or the F./T.T.I.T.,C.B.(now she no longer answers my calls,(but then she would not be the first woman to not answer my calls!)) When I checked the web sight, it was gone, like it had never existed! Could have sworn I saw more traffic helicopters this week, never noticed they were so black before, and now there is this guy installing a new floor across the street,(for about 3 days now) never heard of the company, its not in the phone book, Floor, Bilt, Installed. oh wait they just left, weird because its like 2am here...and now a ice cream truck just pulled up, all shinny black, Flavoured, Buttery, Ice, hummmm, oh there they go too! lots of traffic tonight, whats this? Flow's Butcher's Incense, ok I give up, time for a little nap, maybe things will be less wierd when I get back, but first I got a Idea, I'll let you know how it works out...

O.K. I'm back, shorter trip this time, and no beer spilled on me!(had strange dream of Tommy lee Jones&Will Smith, but thats about it.) Sucsess! I set my alarm, left all the lights on and set a trap for the bleary eyed bugger, I give you photographic proof of the existitance of beer moochen little subcreatures! Behold!

O.K. the teddy bear must be his, but I think those are my slippers, So we just sat there looking at each other, till his(my!) beer was gone, then he moved my coffee table,(I didn't see the point in it since I was awake,) slowly he melted into the flowery pattern, and was gone! I rubbed my eyes, jumped up to check the camera, and smashed my toes on the coffee table!(dam crafty little bugger!) If some how I could go back in time, as like in butterfly effect,(inhabit the same body,) as appossed to back to the future,(not inhabit the same body,) what I would do is go back to when I was a baby, and sleep, and sleep, and sleep! I'm sure my parents wish I would have slept all night back then, and I sure wish I could get like a soild 10hrs. now, to me it seams the perfect solution.

Had a fifteen minute conversation about soap recently, a first for me. Alli the soap maker was teaching me about soap,(I always thought there was three kinds of soap, Day's Inn, Hotel 6, and dish!) The cool thing is its like combo soap, you know the sea spunge things? it's in the soap! and as you scrub, it's all there! and the other one she gave me,(boy I must have really stunk that day!) is a soap ball, with a scrubby inside, and these soap smelled so yummy, that if I just hadn't had pork chop and cabbage unroll's,(thanks Alli, yummy!) they may have been in real danger of mid trip munchy!

Gave myself a haircut this week,(stupid hot muggy, no rain, heat wave!) I have only paid for one hair cut in like the last 17 years or so,(I had no hand mirror so had to pay for a straight trim)(sounds dirty to pay for trim!) So I bought a hand mirror, and did this to myself.(glad with digital cameras you dont have to pay for the 30 that didn't even have me in them!) Must have been to hard to aim and smile at the same time. Since I'm old I'll call it my moldhawk, a nother few years, it'll be a baldhawk,(nohawk?) still lots from ear to ear, so might want to start going east to west, instead of north to south. On to the Bachelor tip's of the day, this first ones good for this hard economic time.

tip A. Buy beer you don't like, if your like me this is harder than it sounds, but I found somthing I don't love too much, usally this type of beer is cheaper,(and sometimes comes with a prize aswell!) if you cant find one you dont like, find one your friends dont like! To tell the true taste of beer, drink it at roon temp. if it tastes good warm, its great cold, so if its bad warm, drink it very cold. a great tip for super chilled beer, buy a pack,(some cheap beer comes in a cooler pack,) put in the freezer, the cooler pack will insulate the beer and keep it just above freezing!

tip B. say you have paid most of your bills, have some food in the fridge, and about $100 left for the rest of the month, the best way to stretch this a long way is to go to the bank and change it all to pennys, you'd be amazed how long you can keep it if its a pain in the ass to spend. For me it's the other way, my last $100 is all change already, more then once I've gone to a good course ($25-$40) and paid all in quarters and dimes, maybe a couple of loones/toones, ($1-$2 for you internationals) all it takes is a little time, and try to find out how much you'll need before you go, golfing with $7.84 in spare change in your pockets can be destracting! Well I've had a rough week, even with my earlier nap, still time for bed.(To coin a phrase, "Call me an A-hole, cause I'm wiped!") have a great week, DufferKev